November 2006


Englishman in New York30 Nov 2006 11:22 pm

Well, you have to live in the UK. And you’ll need a coupon. Take a look at this.

UPDATE:

Web discount frenzy at Threshers

Off-licence chain Threshers is braced for an onslaught of bargain-hunting drinkers as an online discount voucher is downloaded by millions of people.

The 40%-off wine and champagne voucher was intended for suppliers and their friends, but has been distributed widely via blogs, email and chatrooms.

Queues have formed at one store while the Threshers website has crashed under the strain of demand for the offer.

“It was never intended to get this big,” a company spokesperson said.

More here.

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Englishman in New York30 Nov 2006 10:06 am

Telemarketing calls are a hazard of working from home, which explains why I found this clip so refreshing. (Via Stephen Pollard.)

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Englishman in New York29 Nov 2006 12:48 pm

I think the Diary of a Disenfranchised Bookseller is on to something:

The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.

On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.

The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.

The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.

Conclusion: Eat and drink whatever you like. It’s speaking English that kills you.

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Englishman in New York28 Nov 2006 10:21 am

I’ve been studying Tai Chi for the past three months now. About one month ago, a retired cop called Joe joined our class. Joe is a fun guy, about 6ft tall and around 180 pounds, with a white, stubbly chin. On Saturday, our instructor tried to explain to Joe the practical application of one of the moves he had just learned.

I was standing square in front of Joe, all 5ft 5ins and 155 pounds of me. I was pretending to punch Joe, and Joe was supposed to step backwards, parry my blow and then strike me with his other hand.

Tai Chi is not as simple as it looks and Joe had a little bit of trouble co-ordinating the step-parry-punch combo. So the teacher stopped him and asked: “What do we do when someone attacks us Joe?”

She meant to answer the question with the phrase “We retreat.” But before she could say anything Joe pulled an imaginary gun and pointed it directly at my chest.

I thought it was pretty funny at the time. But it seemed particularly poignant the next day when I read that one man died and two were injured in a hail of 50 bullets fired by New York policemen in Queens.

By now, I am sure you will be familiar with the fact that all three of the victims were in a car, that they were black, they were unarmed, and that the man who died was due to be married the next day. Quite rightly, there is an awful lot of anger about what happened.

According to the latest story in the New York Times today, Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly says officers are trained to shoot no more than three bullets before pausing to reassess the situation and NYPD policy largely prohibits officers from firing at vehicles, even when they are being used as weapons.

But would 15 bullets have been less deadly than 50? And however well police officers are trained, is it any surprise that cases like this occur?

The shooting happened at night outside a strip club that is notorious for drugs, weapons and prostitution. One of the men is reported to have argued with a stripper and then with a man outside. Police Commissioner Kelly says an officer claims to have heard one of the victims say: “Yo, get my gun.”

Although the victims were unarmed they are reported to have driven their car first at one plainclothes police officer and then at an unmarked police van. Who knows, maybe they panicked when the plainclothes officer drew his weapon? Maybe they never heard him identify himself as an officer and thought they were being attacked? That certainly seems to be what is being hinted at in reports so far.

But isn’t it a fact that as long as you have armed police officers, there are always going to be cases of innocent people being killed?

Obviously, race is a major issue in this incident. It’s worth pointing out that, according to the New York Times, of the five officers who fired on the car, two are black, one is black and Hispanic, and two are white.

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Englishman in New York27 Nov 2006 09:10 am

Amateur - Lasse Gjertsen
03:39

Via Soul Sides

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Englishman in New York23 Nov 2006 12:33 am

IMG_0249.jpg

Another photo from my walk in Prospect Park with Sofie earlier this month.

I’m heading out to Jersey early in the morning for a Thanksgiving dinner in Vineland. To my American readers, and to everyone else, Happy Thanksgiving!

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Englishman in New York22 Nov 2006 10:28 pm

Seinfeld’s Kramer (Michael Richards) Racist Tirade
02:47

For those who haven’t seen it yet, here is the footage of Michael Richards (of Seinfeld fame) losing the plot on stage the other night. Truly mezmerizing. Like watching a car crash in slow motion.

You can read the New York Times report into his later appearance and apology on David Letterman’s show here. (It looks like CBS had the YouTube video of the interview pulled.) Via Clive Davis.

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Englishman in New York22 Nov 2006 08:21 am

It’s almost winter and I have not read a work of fiction since the spring. In fact, I had almost forgotten that I read that book, Lonesome Dove, until I remembered that I took it on holiday to Texas in March.

Nowadays, I’m ashamed to say, my reading list is crammed with non-fiction works: mainly collected writings, histories and biographies. I’m currently 400 pages into Robert Caro’s 1,100-page The Power Broker: Robert Moses and the Fall of New York. Will I ever be set free?

I mentioned this to an American friend who works as a fiction editor at a London publishing house the other day and she told me that I had caught the “American Disease.”

The American Disease, as she described it, is a never-ending desire for knowledge. (I’m not convinced this is a purely American disease; I’d hazard a guess that it goes on in the UK too.) Why waste valuable hours on make believe when you can learn something instead?

The answer is, of course, that it is possible to learn a lot more from a work of fiction than purely facts and figures. Great novels are an exploration of great (and often timeless) ideas. But they require a great deal more independent thought than a work of non-fiction. When I finished Yuri Trifonov’s The House on the Embankment I had explored the concepts of time and memory. The subject still fascinates me. When I finish Caro’s biography of Robert Moses I will have a better understanding of the city around me. But will I have learned anything about the human condition, other than one man’s monomaniacal vision for New York City and State?

However much I miss fiction, I cannot escape my hunger for fact. As I cast an eye towards the end of the year and our week-long Christmas vacation in the Danish countryside, I have started to put books aside for the trip. Much as The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay and The Bonfire of the Vanities keep tempting me, the two books currently in the lead are 1776 and Dangerous Nation, with A Short History of Nearly Everything jostling for attention. All three—you guessed it—non-fiction.

Cross-posted at Television is Furniture.

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Englishman in New York21 Nov 2006 09:25 am

owlsheadhead.jpg There is something oh so special about the public toilet story.

For a start, it’s generally not the sort of tale a person wants to read over breakfast or lunch. And then there’s the inevitable problem of what to say about a place where people, well, you know.

The story that follows, published recently in the Brooklyn Papers, does a valiant job of solving both problems. Light-hearted, clever and wonderfully silly, it keeps you reading all the way to the end.

Cub reporter Paul Koepp has quite a career ahead of him.

Behold the beauty of Hitting the Head at Owl’s Head:

owls head.jpg

(A story in today’s New York Times about new toilets in Times Square pulls off a less entertaining, but by no means less valiant, attempt.)

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